The Truth

Ok, let’s be truthful now. Maybe things won’t work out the way we all hoped for. Maybe, peace will never come to Iraq because of our fellow ‘loving’ Arab and Iraqi brothers and sisters. Maybe our people will never agree on one thing because we just don’t fit each other’s criteria. However, who knows what will happen? Can we be certain that things won’t be the way it’s supposed to be in Iraq? Can we be certain that Iraq will be a successful rich country? I guess the best way to not be disappointed or ‘overly-excited’ is to try and keep open to the large possibilities for the future of Iraq. I’ve become such a pessimistic person that I want to change my way of thinking about Iraq because it’s actually destroying me internally if I continue to think the way I always have. Maybe with God’s will, Iraqis will understand what they’re doing wrong…that they’ll give up in the near future.

The minds of the Iraqi people who live in Iraq till now have a completely different way of thinking and believing when you compare them to the minds of the Iraqi people who live outside Iraq. As some have mentioned, when we have Iraqi family members or relatives coming to visit, you do get to realize the difference between you and them. I understand that completely because that was the only 'ONE' reason why my dad and his sister got into a very big misunderstanding (I wont call it fights because they still love each other but don't talk to one another anymore). My aunt had a misunderstanding with my mum (her sister) as well. Because we lived outside Iraq for years and years, our loving family think we are happy, better off, and have the money or the ability to help. They would come to us and ask for help especially when it comes to money. I do not blame them needing money, but why the assumption that they think we are rich and happy? We are suffering just as much as they are but unlike them, we had to start a whole new life…a whole new career, lifestyle and a whole new group of contacts in a world we didn't know where to go... the only difference is we got one thing more than they do now...and that's something called 'more safety'. But we still long for the old days, we still get these flashbacks of the evil days under Saddam, and continue to have little hope for Iraq being better.

Iraqis are hopeless...more than we Iraqis outside Iraq are. There shouldn't be one doubt for that to happen. We shouldn't even underestimate their actions due to the affect of the past. They lost most of their optimism throughout the years of Saddam in rule when we left our home for a better life. Now they see and experience things we don't; the killings, the bombs, the explosions, the kidnappings, the ransoms...all in their own eyes. Would we be optimistic then, if we saw that in reality in front of our own two vulnerable eyes? Doubt so.

I have dreams of going back home. Considering I left Iraq when I was only 3 years old and visiting it couple of years ago from now, makes me want to go back more than ever. I grew to love the people, the lifestyle; I felt I was at home. I never knew many of my family members well enough even though half of them by now are old, dead or just simply gone. It's like I have a duty to do,..to meet these remaining lovely people which I barely got to know well enough. It's the least I got to do.

Yes, I'm still dreaming my own fantasies alright. I guess I fear the possibility that Iraq will turn into a permanent battlefield, home for the terrorists and just simply another Palestine/Israeli-like country....only that this is between Iraqis VS terrorists/religious leaders imposing laws on the people of Iraq. However, what is the point if we think Iraq will be successful when it may not be? What is the point if we think Iraq will be a place of hell when it may eventually improve rapidly within a few years? We shouldn't judge what we immediately see, even though that's what I'm doing unfortunately, at some point. I know that hoping for the best when it may not happen can be painful which is why I began being pessimistic. We don't know how this whole situation will end, so I began assuming the worst. On the other hand, being pessimistic itself is also painful. There's no way that our thoughts and beliefs will end up being painless. We are so proud or afraid that we either expect the worst or the best of the possible scenarios.

But we should give it a chance…be more open to a future which we aren't sure about…We should just try to hope for a good future rather than assume the world is going to end for Iraq. These events test our abilities and minds. They also help us learn a lesson if we intend to acknowledge it. I know most of us Iraqis outside Iraq do not see any good in the situation but the point is, you never know what life holds for us tomorrow or next year. Good or bad. Which is why I now believe, if someone asks 'how do you think Iraq will be in a few years time?' ..the best answer would be 'I wouldnt have a clue but we'll soon find out what we're gonna get!'

Who told us that Iraq will be bad or good? We are only assuming from what we see on TV or hear from our family in Iraq. The only advice I'm trying to give myself as well as everyone is, we better keep those eyes and minds open in order to patiently wait and see what life will give us all.

And as the famous quote goes..., 'Life is full of surprises'...expect the best and the worst simultaneously, before it's too late..